“…In The History Of Earth”

In keeping with recent Christmas tradition, I took my studio out for dinner and drinks Thursday night – a small thank you for their year’s work.  It was a good time as always.

I started these studio meetings a few years ago during the recession as a sort of morale booster.  Those were dark days for our profession.  Our firm, just like most every other, was forced to make hard cuts and no one was immune.  All of my mentors were gone; some had left of their own free will, some not.  At any rate, we, the studio was in many respects a ship without a rudder.  And though I was no more likely to keep my job than they were at the time, they needed someone to look to as the leader.  I assumed the role out of necessity, a long time before that title could be recognized officially.  I have benefited from that decision greatly. 

Perhaps because of the manner in which I came to be Studio Leader, I’ve never thought of myself as their boss per se and I still don’t really.  Before I get into this, it should be said that I’m aware of the unavoidable fact that I am a damn sight more emotional than a grown ass man should be.  Knowing this, I didn’t read the Christmas card that they had all signed until I got home that night.    

When I did finally read the card, I was blown away...on the floor actually.  Apparently, in spite of the fact that they are forced to endure the eclectic musical mix of Billie Holiday and Anthrax and Marshall Tucker Band spilling from my office, they still think I’m a good boss.  Even though, I’m nearly silent for days at a time because of whatever weirdo shit is in my head, they see me as an inspiration.  They even manage to correctly interpret my bizarre tangents of criticism of their work as the vehicle that I do, one that will make them better architects and designers.

It’s astonishing to me that I am so lucky to be surrounded by such a group on the daily.  I literally never have had occasion to interact with a more solid collective of human beings and I damn sure have never taken the time to say that to them.  We’re all different; from all over the country, from all different backgrounds, all ages – Texas, Chicago, Ohio, Georgia, Michigan, Tennessee, nowhere.  We all have our thing, right?  We’re all interested, almost every single one, in a different aspect of architecture.  But we all have a common goal; to contribute to the success of this firm and that is what makes us strong.  (If I’m a leader at all, I should recognize and develop that individual interest, and I haven’t always done that.)

Also on Thursday, coincidentally, I interviewed two early graduates for a potential opening we might have in the New Year.  They were bright kids; full of energy and ideas, their belief that architecture can change the world still intact, untainted by the bullshit they’ve yet to encounter.  It certainly wasn’t that long ago that I had sat on their side of the table fielding similar ridiculous questions from this side.  As I gave them the nickel tour I couldn’t help but remember mine.  For me, and I’m sure them, it was like I had finally stepped onto the threshold.  I was overwhelmed with the opportunity that was in front of me.  I was concerned that I wasn’t good enough.  There’s a “full circle” type of deal that happened Thursday that I am trying to, but not yet articulating very well.

Everything I just said stands in stark contrast to my idealized view of my career.  It’s not supposed to be personal – it’s supposed to be me against the world, right?  Interpersonal relationships should receive no quarter as I perceive this profession.  Make no mistake; we are at war, at least in a philosophical and intellectual sense.  That I now see the value of friendship inside of that construct is nothing short of a Christmas miracle. 

They also, just for the record bought me a Blick gift card.  That in of itself is way more than the perfect gift for me.  I suppose, just to send me into a different orbit, it was signed as follows:

            To:  The Boss

            From: The greatest studio in the history of earth. 

I couldn’t agree more.  That you said it that way warms my old strange heart – my ridiculous nonsense verbal idiosyncrasies have taken root in your normalcy!

This likely won’t happen again, so pay attention.  I learn as much, more from you on the regular than I could ever teach.  If I am a good leader, it’s because of you.  You make me question my professional reality everyday and that is a good thing.  Yes, there is an intellectual war on between us and them but we are on the same side.  We are, you are the greatest studio and we are going to absolutely kill it in 2014.  

Merry Christmas and thank you!  You are as much my family as my actual family is.  I dig that about y’all. 

Peace.