Lennon & Shinedown?

(31) years ago tonight John Lennon was shot down in the street in front of the Dakota in NYC.  Howard Cosell told me so during Monday Night Football. I was eight. I knew who the Beatles were but I had no real idea who he was.  I had not yet grown into a place where Lennon’s words would matter to me – I was a child.  I remember being especially sad though.  As I’ve grown older I’ve become more and more sad knowing that he’s not around.  I would have loved to hear the music he would have made. 

I’m not someone who holds musicians up as gods (except for Joe Strummer of course) but Lennon was different.  He said exactly what the world wished were true.  He was long dead before I was a grown man, but he colored how I grew into manhood and who I was when I got there.

Part of the ironic part is that I had no intention of listening to John Lennon’s songs in tribute today.  I pay my respect in the way that I do, but that doesn’t mean I Wanna Hold Your Hand.  It doesn’t even mean Imagine. 

As it turns out, my company’s “Holiday Party” was tonight as well.  Call me what you will, but I had never been to a firm function without a beautiful girl on my arm.  I didn't know what to do, how to act, who to talk to even.  It's like I was retarded, and I know that I'm better than that.  I admit it sucked.  I eventually found a place to be and it was okay after a bit.  The first one we went to was the first of many bars we would shut down.  I’ll never forget our legendary coming out party, but it seems like a million years from that night to this.  So be it.

The after-hours supposed short ride home quickly turned to shit in Buckhead so I pulled a random CD from under the seat to pass the time.  Shinedown.  It wasn’t by design that I picked polar opposite of John Lennon but it worked.

You gave me that CD as a Christmas gift some time ago.  You never really understood how I could hit those harmonies, and I didn’t either.  You thought it was about my first wife, but it was about you.  I think we both saw the writing on the wall or whatever even then.  Regardless, I listened to this song on repeat for 120 minutes of pristine ATL traffic and dissected everything there is or ever was about us. Yeah, it’s been a while. It still sucks. 

So John Lennon’s dead (31) years.  That's sad.  I have neither time nor inclination to mourn a dead rock star tonight.  That's sad, too.