05 May 2012

The Fifth of May

5 May historically is the day that (legend has it) some 30-odd Mexican soldiers defeated an invading French force of more than 10,000 near Puebla, Mexico.  It was more like 4,000 to 8,000 but still an impressive victory for an undermanned, under-equipped Mexican army.  So why do we care?  It's Mexican Independence Day, right?  Nope!  The Battle of Puebla happened 50+ years after that historic fact.  We care because it’s a helluva an excuse to get rip-roaring in celebration.  We are Americans – that’s what we do.  We care for the same reason that countless thousands of non Irish-Americans celebrate St. Patrick’s Day.  Those with Irish heritage make up about 12 % of the U.S. population but this country drowns in green beer 17 March every year.  I think we would celebrate the Tet Offensive if someone told us we should…a rattlesnake’s birthday?  Sure.  Why not?  That’s what we do! 

Cinco de Mayo apparently isn’t even observed in Mexico outside of the Free and Sovereign State of Puebla.  What our collective tequila-addled minds forget (or don’t realize) is that we actually should celebrate Cinco de Mayo as an American holiday.  Had Ignacio Zaragoza not led his troops to victory that day, the United States would have been a different place.  Possibly, there would be no such thing as the United States of America as we know it.    The French, led by Napoleon III (the famous short guy’s nephew),  had a singular objective for invading Mexico in my opinion – to gain a foothold in North America close enough to the U.S. to alter the outcome of the Civil War.  The 5 May in question occurred in 1862 by the way, just a month after the South's narrow defeat at the Battle of Shiloh and just before Stonewall Jackson would forcibly evict Union forces from the Shenandoah Valley.  The Confederates were on a roll and the French wanted a piece of that action.

What France really wanted was to strike a blow at the United States without having to fight them directly.  If the Battle of Puebla ends differently, the French would have advanced farther north into Mexico and would have established a base of operations from which they could have continually resupplied the Confederate Army.  Invariably, French troops would have been added to the mix.  IF either happens there is a better than average chance that the South wins the damn thing!  Imagine this country if that unthinkable had come to pass. 

Had the South been able to win the war under this scenario they would have owed their independence to a French command that had designs on nothing less than dominant imperialism.  They certainly didn’t share the values the Confederates held dear.  So if the South wins, there would be a necessary payback, right?  If the South wins, Jefferson Davis would have been replaced with a sympathizing puppet leader and the French would have successfully broken the Union.  A divided country would not have withstood that pressure on the heels of a devastating civil war.  At the time, France held one of the strongest armies in the free world and would have certainly exerted that power against a defeated Northern Army and eventually colonized these great United.  If the South wins, we are all speaking French with a wicked Southern drawl and what we know and love as the United States of America would have never fulfilled its destiny as a world superpower.  I’m from the South and I can report that Cinco de Mayo is vigorously embraced and observed by these chuckleheads.  If they really knew what was being celebrated the 5th of May would be epic!  (Nobody really likes the French after all.)

Some historians believe Zaragoza and Lincoln should equally share credit for preserving the Union.  I tend to agree with that evaluation.  So as you suck down your watery margarita and your obligatory fish taco take a second and raise a glass to my good buddy Iggy Zaragoza and our Mexican compatriots. Without their bravery and resolve that day back in 1862 we might not be who we think we are today. 

Enjoy your queso.



Ignacio Zaragoza
24 March 1829 – 8 September 1862

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